Wednesday, March 07, 2007

From Lebanon 17

The Zalghouta

First a note to my foreign readers: Even though it rhymes with it, Zalghouta has nothing to do with that One arabic word you know.

The Zalghouta is a physical feat involving the tongue and throat, usually, of a female. No, no, I repeat this has nothing to do with that one arabic word you know.

The Zalghouta is a loud expression of the happy ending of bachelor life. I swear it has nothing to do with sex, even though ladies who can perform it tend to have higher babies per uterus averages than women who can't.

I don't think it is either a genetically inherited talent or an acquired skill, it must be another one of these unexplainable Lebanese miracle mutations like full make up breakfasts and Walid Jumblat.

Whatever the zalghouta is, enjoy it, be happy as it is a sirening omen of an open bar, unless you are stuck at a dry wedding, or much worse a sex seggregated one, in which case you only have yourself to blame for being there.

The Zalghouta, yet another akhou @#$%^&*@# tradition from Lebanon.




P.S. I've labeled all the From Lebanon posts "From Lebanon", if you'd like to go back and learn more about traditions from Lebanon.

8 comments:

Bedouina said...

Yabbut can you give us translations of some of the rhymes?

Or have Lebanese women given up reciting those because the (@#*$& electronic sound systems at wedding parties drown them out? Or they are still chanting them, you've just never heard them?

Seriously, and respectfully, I am very interested in zalghouta rhymes by women. Do you know if anybody has collected these for an anthropology dissertation?

Delirious said...

Eh walla, badda zalghouta ;-)

l said...

Funny :)

Kodder said...

hahaha...
damn you jamal.
I am in the quiet lab, and I burst out of laughing and everyone is sshh-ing me now :P.

Ana Min Beirut said...

hahahahahhahahahahaha

Ya Jamal nchallah nifrah minnak
Wou b3erssak el neswen ti7keh 3annak
wou tjeeb 3achr wled k2anak
cheikh el 3achireh wou khyemna t3alat ....
wou lililililililililililili

Anonymous said...

uhaaa ya khet ya khet
uhaaa ya khirye wara el 7et
uhaa ijet el jeje na3fato
uhaaa tel3et ri7to mlet el bet

Bedouina said...

You guys are laughing at me, fine. Explain the joke to me or I have to go ask my cousins. Then they'll have to visit your blog, email me, etc. My dad died so I can't ask him anymore.

Please? I understood the first one by "ana min Beirut" although I have a feeling there's a joke in there that my literal mind doesn't quite get.

I totally do not get anonymous at 11:47 besides something about his smell and a chicken.

Okay, enjoy laughing at the Americaniye who doesn't understand.

Jamal said...

not really Bed,

the thing with zalghoutas is that they should be taylored to the occasion there really arent a compilation of them. While many are repeated at every wedding, a good zalghouta has to be unique for a one time use.