Friday, January 26, 2007

On the Verge of War

With Lebanon on the verge of war, I have plenty of specimens of evil around to examine and determine whether people are born that way or whether evil is an acquired taste just like caviar.

The streets of Beirut have showcased a plethora of evil the past few days. So surely I can go to one of the rooftop snipers ask him to lay on a couch, carress his hair, and listen to him open up to me about the trauma he suffered when he walked in on his dad cheating on his mom with his 1st grade English teacher whom he had a crush on and had spent all his allowance buying apples for. Weren't apples also involved in the original sin? Hmm... But no, that can't be it, I'm sure Mother Teresa had an apple or two growing up and she turned out OK.

We must dig deeper and younger. At risk of sounding pedophiliac, I think we must check out the babies at the maternity ward for answers. These little angels can't be evil. Sure they scream all night, but have you seen the face of that nurse? Also, they were so eager to be born and now they find out they have to wait a year to walk, 2 to talk, 3 to open the fridge, at least 5 to reach the chocolate shelf, over 15 years to get laid, and 21 years to buy a freaking beer. That is evil.

Alas, these little angels aren't so innocent. All you have to do is look at them a day earlier, the moment they were born. Look at the faces of their mothers pushing, sweating, and crying.

A cow drops a calf effortlessly. Hens' eggs are a dime a dozen.

Only pure evil would pay back the mother that carried them in her womb for 9 patient months with pain and agony.

So there you have it, it doesn't get more scientific than this.

*This post was in response to "Are people born evil?" on Love to Lead's Competition. Visit the website where you can read other bloggers' answers after you vote for me. I'm badly in need of a new laptop. You might also win one if you vote for me.
Vote for me on Love To Lead


laila said...

jamal i totally love the fact that ue insanely right all the freakin' time!

Maya@NYC said...

good luck :)

Anonymous said...

mmm... interesting.

bodhisattva said...

Laila, are you looking for a hero :p,

hope you get that laptop dude, if its 2008 and sanioura is in, u might not be able to afford it :p, and the Alternative may be scarrier too, alla yse3edna, maybe the younger generation will be better: Taymour Walid Jumblatt, Rafic Saad Hariri, Michel Gibran Bassil, Michel Samir Geagea :d and the rest

goodluck :)

Jamal said...

Thanks for the help, I've slipped to 3rd but plenty of time to make it up before friday, Did i mention you can vote "once a day"? :o) You can also help by "not liking" the top 2.

i know, Sha77ad w Msharet

Anonymous said...


btw: it's next friday you're talking about, right?