Thursday, May 11, 2006

Protest Survival Kit


Let the pissing match begin. 250 Billion Teachers took to the streets of Beirut to protest something. Yesterday was the first of many "biggest demonstration in the history of Lebanon" to come in the next few weeks. So when your turn to take to the street comes make sure to keep in mind these essential tips.

Flags and banners are essential for demonstrations, actually they are the demonstration. Keep the sweatty people and replace the flags with lollipops and it becomes a rave. So make sure you have the flags, BUT make sure you are not the one carrying them. While flag waving can be fun for a minute or two, it gets tiring and annoying after that; plus you will need your hands free for holding your breath, tossing molotovs, or doing hand signals.

Water is important but carry just enough to keep you alive, extra water will weigh you down if you carry it in your hand and it hinders your tear gas dodging ability if you carry it in your bladder.

Ladies, NO High Heels! I know yesterday you didn't want to be mistaken for a Hezbollahian, but trust me, the blinding fluorescent orange took care of that. Also Gucci kinda weakens your case at a Union protest.

If you're thinking about making a quick buck at the protest by selling party memorabilia, coffee, water, ice cream, or Rear View Mirror Elvises; then think again because someone already beat you to that.

See you at the Bakers' demonstration.

7 comments:

Kodder said...

hahaha, funny :P.

Doha said...

thanks for linking to the bam, bam, bam gun sign :)

Eve said...

haven't you, by any chance, seen the "madam-want-syria-out" lady & her maid?

Dr Victorino de la Vega said...

“Ladies, NO High Heels! I know yesterday you didn't want to be mistaken for a Hezbollahian, but trust me, the blinding fluorescent orange took care of that. Also Gucci kinda weakens your case at a Union protest”

Hmm…that cheaply misogynist cum anti-working class remark clearly shows that you’ve joined the Wahhabi-Druze-Neo-Nazi alliance led by the goateed faux sheikh and his bald war criminal friends.

; )

Ramzi said...

Hillarious Jamal!

I think 250 million billion is more accurate.

hillz said...

hahahha!
It seems that u enjoyed ur time in the demonstration!
i remember in one of past demonstrations that 7arakit amal's group came from nowhere (possibly zqaq elbla6) climbed down the bridge using ropes so they would be in the front of the demonstration.. now that's a scene!!
:P

Anonymous said...

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